dallas times three

dallas times three

I was hoping to go to Puerto Penansco for Memorial Day Weekend, but not enough people wanted to go, or could get time off, or had money. No worries, I'll just go to DFW and party there.

I was upgraded on my 2 hour flight Tucson to DFW and Scott, the first-class attendant, hooked me up with 7 vodka and orange juices. Yes, I was still flying high when I landed. Booth and I went to Smokey Bones, which is like Hooters meets BBQ, only better food and better looking girls. Next, we went and got some culture at the 6th steet book depository. They have a museum set up for Kennedy's assassination. Interesting stuff. They even had the uneditited Zapruder film. I had never seen this before, Kennedys head opens up, my jaw dropped and jumped. Crazy!

From the building

Another angle

A plaque

From the grassy knoll

The actual spot

Where conspiracy theorist believe the other shooter was

a building across the street

I think Ive seen everything there is to see for Kennedy, this museum, his library, his grave at Arlington. (awkward segue) Afterwords we went to Booths place, chilled and waited for another gy to drive up from Beaumont. I played GTAIV, pretty cool game. Did a little drunk driving, got a couple of lap dances, got into a couple of fights, a grandma beat me up, and got some hookers. What else could you ask for in a game? Then we played some GHIII, I smoked Booth, then I got a headache. I realized for the first time in my life I was hungover in the same day. Place a check mark against another life accomplishment. Slammed a bunch of water and then we went out to eat. We went to place called Cubra Libre, I didnt feel like having one so I just had some beer. I ordered quesadillas as my meal and Booth was concerned for me and my lack of appetite. I told him since Ive been back from Germany I just havent really been that hungry. He didnt buy that and called me a pussy. To put his mind at ease and prove my metabolism is still strong. I told him I ate pork and pork by products 3 times a day for 19 days straight all while quenching my thirst with beer and I lost 7 lbs. Conversation over.! After dinner we went to a bar called Gingerbread mans, I think that was the name, or at least we wanted to go there. Unfortunately, Booth left his credit card at the restaurant and we had to go back to get it. When we finally got there I was very pleased with the beer selection. We had our choice of about 65 different beers on tap. Good stuff! Afterwards we went to another bar, but I have no recollection. I was just ready to go home, because we had to get up at seven for golf. That fact was lost on Booth and the other guy, because they played GHIII, very badly I might add, until 3 am. Ive been told I can sleep when Im dead, but Im tired leave me alone.

Saturday
Golf was good, I woke up with a sad, very sad stomach. Through the power of green tea and pop tarts I overcame and was able to hit the ball like a son of a bitch. I shot a 102, not bad for not playing since last June. Everyone was impressed with my iron play. Long and straight. Thats all Im good at though, no putting or chipping or driving. Most people would give up those skills to hit irons long and straight. At least thats what they are saying at me in between curse words.

mike

the guy i keep referring to as "the other guy"

and pure slop

After golf we went to a hamburger cafe, I ate a hamburger in about 6 bites. I dont each much any more, but I can still put it away before you finish half of your food. We went home, showered, napped, and then met one of Booths friends at a Bavarian restaurant. I really wasnt in the mood for German food, but Im always in the mood for German beer so that was okay. I accidentaly ordered potato spatzel, which is a lot like noodles. I dont really like them, but I had forgot what they were called. When I didnt finish them you would have thought I slapped our waitress's mother, she was so upset and offended. Tough cookies. Next we went to a bar and met some other UTEP Alumni people and watched the UFC fight. Im dont normally watch UFC, but there were some pretty good hits and some high fives going around. I didnt hate it. After the matches were over we went home.

Sunday we slept in and went to IHOP, I never think to go to IHOP, but everytime I've been its been great. I had two eggs, english muffins, bacon, hash browns, put it away in 5 minutes. Oh yeah, nothing like refueling. I cant remember what we did after that. I think just chilled and I did some homework. Oh I remember now, we went to see the new Indiana Jones movie. It was alright, very much like a National Treasure movie, and I didnt really like Shia LeBeouf's character. After the movie we went out to a lake in Lewisville. Have you ever been out to Wet 'n' Wild and seen everyone bbqing and all the kids running around in their underwear and fat people swimming with shirts on. Yeah, it felt like home. They also didnt allow drinking so it felt like being underage again. Taking sips from beers after the cops and rent a cops walked passed. So we decided to got to a legit bar and drink legit beers. We went to a place called sneaky petes. It was a really cool place, gazebo bar, 4 sand volleyball courts, sports bar, pool bar, pool, stage for live music. Lots of co-eds in bikinis, not too bad. We were there from about 8 to 2 am. Watched the spurs win, Oh yeah, that doesnt matter now, but it made the night that much better. Two stories I want to share with you. We were walking around and someone laughed in my general direction. No big deal, I didnt even think twice. But Booth decided to make an incident. "Are you laughing at my friend?", The guy said what. "Are you laughing at my friend?" He said no, I would tell you if I was. "Alright, then" Jeez, Booth, what are you doing. Who cares if someone laughs at me. The other friend said. Yeah man, I dont feel like fighting anyone, I said. Fuck that, no ones going to make fun of my friends. It was no big deal I said. Fuck 'em, I've got a black belt in Tae Kwan Do. I dont care if you are packing .45s. Chillax! Next incident took place a little later in the night. I had about 8 beers and about 8 waters, so I was feeling fine, and bloated, but still fine. Booth had about 13 and said he was good to drive. We took the other guy home about 2 miles down the road, but I didnt like Booth driving. So I took the keys. I was doing the speed limit and driving at 10 and 2 and here come the fuzz. Im thinking to myself, Im perfectly coherent, I can do some Calculus, but Im sure Im over .08. So he comes over and goes through his basic questioning. Curious as to why Im driving, wants to know where we were drinking and how much. I have to get out of the car, but Im confident I can pass any field sobriety test. Except for backwards alphabet, I cant do that sober. Turns out we were pulled over for broken liscence plate light and expired registration. Fucking Booth! He told me to have him get his shit fixed and go home. So I was upset, and couldnt sleep because I was jacked up on adrenaline.

Monday
Slept it off, went for a run, Booth made pancakes and bacon. MMMMmmmMMM.
My flight wasnt until 230 so we just played some GHIII, I showed off my expert level skills. My flight was delayed because of a broken lavatory. Its only a 2 hour flight, cant people hold it I asked myself. Our flight was then cancelled over that. Everyone and their mother ran up to the counter. I slowly sashayed to the Admirals Club where I was promptly turned away by the douche bag known as Dino. I know Im not a member, I just thought maybe you could help me out I pleaded. A simple no would have worked, but he went through this whole process of how I could be here, and why I shouldnt be here, and that I dont belong. Okay, so I went to a counter in the general popluation that was free and explained the situation. In two seconds I had my boarding pass, and it was all done with smiles. She said since you are platinum we'll take care of you and we appreciate your business. I was speechless towards her customer service skills. So I was upgraded again and had some nice Ravioli and Cabernet. Touchdown, get luggage, and go home. Memorial Day would have been more fun if we could have gone to the beach, but this was a very close second.

Mandy Moore said my love is sweet like candy,

Jacob