Thursday, December 20, 2007

croatia in pictures

because escobar is impatient, here are the croatia pictures


from the air

airport canopy

view from my room

same

a pirate ship

the view was awesome okay

last one
at the palace

inside the palace

inside a tower inside the palace

in a walkway in the palace looking at another tower

the most famous architect of croatia, not the architect of the palace though
and my personal favorite photo

mas towers

little bit of croatian cosby

some of the beers i drank, the one on the left was my favorite

croatian putt-putt

mini formula-1 croatian style

down by the water

again

some random cat that showed up at the conference

twin beds = no hanky panky...
california king = no hanky panky, so either way...

entrance to some church

croatia from the sky

gays this way

this is what we do in the boys room

we do this too

and here is what i had for dinner one night, the red-snapper

well there you go, hopefully you enjoyed them as much as i did

ill be back in '08

jacob

Sunday, December 16, 2007

croatia in words

Croatia in words

I know I told a lot of you I was going to Split, but I actually went to Trogir. Still on the Adriatic, still nice. Normally I begin day one with traveling, but this blog begins with the day before; traveling to Tucson to spend the night with my cousins so I wouldn’t have to get up so early Friday morning. Well I checked, rechecked, double checked, and tripled checked. Passport and underwear, all I need. Well I was also going to take some food to my cousins that way it wouldn’t spoil at my place. I accidentally left a loaf of bread and a dozen eggs on the counter. That should be a hell of a stink bomb when I come home in 11 days. The flight over was okay, I was thrown out of my exit row seat and had to sit in the center, but it was next to a nice old woman and we chatted it up on the way to Dallas. The flight to Frankfurt was just fine, a little turbulent, but no big deal. I had some sort of beef dish on the way over and then their super discount continental breakfast in the morning. I finally saw the Simpsons movie and I also watched Hot Rod. Hot Rod really sucked, Samberg and Hader definitely need to stick to making digital shorts on SNL. Tried to sleep but it didn’t really work. For whatever reason we were sitting in business class on Lufthansa going to Split. So we had access to their lounge. It was fairly swanky, they serve beer, wine, and liquor and it’s all free. We had some sort of spinach egg omelet and the worst honey dew I’ve ever had in my life. Flying over split was really nice, the Adriatic was beautiful. It’s a very very small town, only here because of summer tourist. The hotel, www.hotelmeden.com , looks much nicer here than it does in real life. Its forty years old and you can definitely tell it’s a former Yugoslavian state, I don’t think the décor has changed since the original. I had a balcony which was nice and of course dual twin beds, so that I could not partake in hanky panky.

Saturday I got to the hotel and went to bed, slept until 4 got up watched some entourage and went to dinner. We had dinner at the hotel and it wasn’t very good. Went to bed and got up at 4 in the morning. Did my homework until breakfast at 8.

Sunday was a slow day, just set up the network and did all the updates and restores we needed. Sunday I went to the Kamerlengo Fortress and had some pretty good dinner. Walked around, really was quite an experience. Cobblestone floors, all the window have outward facing working wooden shutters.

Monday was the preconference and it was pretty laxed. I can’t really remember what I did now, but after the day was over I went to their gym and met an Australian named Taylor. Couldn’t really understand a word he said, but it was an enjoyable conversation. He wished he had learned more about computers; he was amazed that a kid from Texas would be doing the computer network at a conference in Crotia, I said yeah pretty sweet gig. He told me he was sorry I had to come in winter because there is no one here. Had it been in the summer and there were babes here I would have been laid twice a day. A fact I scoffed at in my head, but you never know, I’ve been told I’m not really that ugly. After that I went to a pizzeria and had a pretty good Hawaiian pizza. Went back to the room and finished up my entourage dvds.

Tuesday was the start of the conference; we had the in briefing and the roll call of nations. Took a group photo and then went on a coffee break. Ahhh the life. Tuesday night was our ice breaker, had quite a few beers and a shitload of calamari. Passed out at 2130, stupid time change.

So now it’s currently Wednesday and it pouring. We had a thunder clap that almost lasted 10 seconds. It kept roaring and the windows were rattling. Really something else. Im supposed to go on the cultural today, in about 3 hours, hopefully its stops raining. I think it’s in the forties right now, but this is where I get the bulk of my pictures, so I hope they don’t cancel it.

Alright well I’m going to get back to getting paid to do my homework. I’ll finish the rest up later. Alright, well now its Friday morning, I’ve been up since 3 am, I’ll tell you why a little later on. Let us resume from the un-canceled cultural tour.

Our cultural tour was to Split, about 35 minutes away but 1.21 hours because of traffic. We were going to tour the Diocletian palace. A Roman structure that was built in the 3rd century BC. It rained the entire time we were on the bus, but thankfully it subsided by the time we got to the palace. The sea was really rough that day, not too often I get to say that but, that’s what it was. There was a lot of graffiti on the streets. A lot of swastikas and crossed out swastikas. A lot of long live rock and ac/dc, I guess they shun that genre. And my favorite was emo sucks. So I didn’t know if they meant the kids or the person, either way they both suck. It was pretty cold and windy throughout the tour. We walked around the basement, and the courtyard, and went through various small passages. The entire palace is now an outlet mall, which is kind of sad that they couldn’t have done something better with it. But the place is a few hectares big, and the economy is dependent on tourism money, seems like that was the only conclusion to be drawn. Stopped into an Italian restaurant while I was there and had a really good spaghetti fettuccine with salmon and calamari. Love that calamari. Then the rain started to pour, walked around, stopped at the Lacoste store and Pierre Cardin store, but neither of the girls working the counters knew what my metric measurements were, nor did they care. I guess I could have ball parked it, but I couldn’t figure out the exchange rate in my head and I didn’t feel like getting a bill for hundreds of dollars when what I thought in my head was different by a decimal place. Got on the bus passed out and woke up we were at the hotel. Put my clothes on the radiator and went to bed.

Thursday was going to be a first full day of work, at least with no planned interruptions, i.e. cultural tour, in briefing, and the like. It was a rough day to get through 10.5 hours and most of that was without internet. But I finished all of my database homework. Went to the gym and then went back to the pizzeria and had two pizzas. Fast forward 6 hours from that time and you’ll know why I was awake at 4am, heartburn. I guess at 24 I’m aging because I had killer heartburn or indigestion, not sure which. Ive only ever used pepto bismal for upset stomach. But now I know that their commercial isn’t lying when it says it takes care of heartburn, bloating, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea you know the jingle. So like all European tv you can always find some naked girls on tv doing naked stuff. Read some from my java book, then watched a little old school Americas funniest home videos with Bob Sagat, circa ’95 and then some everybody loves Raymond. It was in English with Croatian subtitles, I thoroughly enjoyed.

So now is Friday and only a half day, get to pack up and have an outbriefing and cultural dinner. Hopefully its pretty tasty. We found out that the cultural tour was going to be at the hotel, which meant hotel food, so we high tailed it back to the Kamerlengo fortress for dinner. Walked around and got lost a little bit, had some veal cutlets. Didn’t really care for the veal, but now I know. Went back for the traditional dinner and sure as shit it was hotel food, but the alcohol was flowing. Red and white wine and beer. And like always the nations bring their own, so had some good scotch whiskey from Scotland and some death looking black licorice drink from Finland. It made jager its bitch. Our entertainment was the Croatian Naval Acapella group. They were fantastic, had no idea what they were saying but that was okay. They sang one Elvis song and it was great. Got into an argument with the Germans on how to drink Jager, evidently they sip it at room temperature there. Well when I bought a round I said prost, and slammed that bad boy down. They were looking at me in disgust, while they sipped it. I said don’t you slam this in Germany? No, it’s a sipping after dinner drink. “Well in America we shoot this” and I slammed one more. Well they didn’t care for that. So I cleverly said, “USA! USA!” I guess anyone can be an asshole drunk. We were friends in the morning, so it’s all good. Since the airport doesn’t open early we had to overnight in Frankfurt. Stayed at some industrial area of Frankfurt where the prostitutes run rampant, at least that’s what it seemed like, didn’t see any. Had some fantastic un-pasteurized german hefeweizen and delightful red snapper with coriander foam and rice, it was a little foo foo, but tasty. Sunday was our flight and I watched all three movies on the plane. Not much left to say, had a good time, recommend you go there, not for a week, but a day or two trip.

Herpes free since ‘83

jacob

Sunday, December 9, 2007

lost wisdom

lost wisdom Sorry I didnt post this last week. I thought I had written it earlier and I was busy with finals this week. I had my wisdom teeth removed back in October. Not because my dentist said to, not because the maxiofaciallary surgeon said to, but because my hip African-American dental tech said it would be a good idea. The DDS said I should have them removed because the 3rd molar and the wisdom tooth could form pockets which could lead to decay and death. The MD said I should have them taken out because the nerver that runs along my mandible was about a milimeter away from the wisdom tooth root and that would cause an extreme amount of pain. The hip African-American said, "Dude, you don't need them. Might as well have them taken out, you have a small mouth and you already have 32 teeth, you don't need 4 more. Best logic I ever heard. So I scheduled the teeth to be extracted and my mom freaked out. You cant have them taken out, youre not in any pain, whos going to take care of you, you cant drive home from the doctor, youll be under general anethesia. Andrew had his taken out, he wasnt in any pain, Im having it done in Tucson, Ill be fine. "No, Im coming out" Okay OKay OKAy OKAY. The extraction was a lot of fun, they gave me some NO2 and I was super laughy. They also gave me 14 shots in the mouth, they could have removed all my teeth and I wouldnt have felt anything. The doctors assistant kept making me laugh during the surgery which kind of upset the doctor. He was having a hard time pulling one of the teeth out and I started laughing at him. My two bottom teeth were pretty much perpendicular to the back molars so he had to break them. He said okay youre going to hear a little crack. It sounded like he was crushing walnuts. I could see him wincing during, you see I have extremely hard teeth from all the milk I drink. I felt no pain afterwards, just completely swollen. I think I lost 5 lbs. from all the meals I missed. I ate a lot of applesauce and pudding that weekend, so I had no problem putting the weight back on. Since I was so hungry I moved to solid and crunchy food a little too soon and caused myself quite a lot of pain. After about 6 days the swelling went down, but then bruising showed. Very yellow, I looked like a jaundice victim. When I went back to have my stiches removed, I asked the assistant about the bruising, she said she punched me while I was unconcious. What she meant to say was they had to break my jaw to get some of the teeth out. OH LOVELY! My mother stayed with me one night and again refused to use the blow up mattress she bought for herself. So an idle mattress awaits one of you hotties, still waiting to be christened.
Forever Rico y Suave,

Jakey


here you can see the perpendicular wisdom teeth, bottom left hand corner and bottom right

removed perpendicular wisdom teeth

and the swollen aftermath

Sunday, November 25, 2007

SARC07

The Southern Arizona Racquetball Championships were a few weeks ago and as many of you know I was ousted in the first round of both divisions. Granted I moved up two divisions from last year, nevertheless, I shouldn’t have lost so soon. There are a million reasons why I lost but none matter because I simply and frankly didn’t play better than my opponents. Game 1 Friday evening at 1930, “C” division was against someone from Nogales. Now a lot of you know my record against Mexican nationals, don’t know why they are my Achilles heel, but they just are. I played well, but I lost 15-14 and 15-12. I played well because I had him cursing the entire game, mamon, mames, and mamey, but I guess I should take up cursing because I lost last year that way too. If I had to make an excuse, it would be that the game was late or that I tried to kill the ball when I didn’t need too, but in reality I just stunk. Oh well! Next day 0830 my first match in the “B” division, playing a guy who has only been playing for 1 year. Isn’t that special! Well I lost to him 15-13 and 15-11. And he had the nerve to say if we had to go to the tiebreaker I would have won because he was out of gas. Lovely! So my day was over at 0900. I tried to get into the consolation tournament but the tournament director wouldn’t allow it because I was playing in two divisions. Doesn’t make any sense but what are you going to do? There’s no one who reads this blog who could beat me in racquetball, but I’m sorry I let you all down. There’s a Toys for Tots tournament next month, but it just isn’t the same. I promise next year I will include pictures of me with a trophy.

Full on humble pie,

Yours

Sunday, November 18, 2007

54 of 50

We here at MAIB have hit our first milestone a few posts back. 50 blogs, actually this is 54, thus far. And what a journey it’s been. From the series debut, to November and February sweeps, and now into syndication already. We would like to thank all of our viewers, past and present, some of you have been lucky to make guest appearances. I would like to thank all of you for the fan mail over the years, yes it has been years already. This is only the first of many milestones I believe, as I have a full slate of travel in 08 and 09 already scheduled. I appreciate all of you immensely and I only write this piece because of all of you. I hope you all continue to enjoy my tales. Below is a list of every episode thus far. Which is your favorite? Are you like me? Can’t decide? There all my favorite! Yeah me too! Like always, thanks for the love and I look forward to the next 50.

Sincerely,

That guy.

******************************************

54 of 50

Fieldtrip

Columbus Day

3rd house guest

TSAS of the World

Anton Weismann

Budapest in pictures

Budapest in words

Labor Day

Global mis-adventures in bachelorhood?

Dallas doubles series one

Clara’s wedding

June 07

Virgina

New York new York

Trix

40 days and 40 nights

March on in

The very unannual sweepstakes

Salt Lake City

Death of a truck club

Jesus’ birthday aught 6

Jax

Dallas doubles series V

Sweepstakes revisited

Southern Arizona Racquetball Championship

365 days in Sierra Vista

2nd House guest

Texember part ^ 3

Texember part II

Texember part 1

First house guest

The aristocrats

Worst day ever

Racquetball

D terminal

Bahston

Greatest one day road trip

It’s pronounced hu-vai-he

I thought I’d never get to participate in this stupid game

Sweepstakes

Clip show

I wish I were a pussy

W.W.B.D

What to do

Maybe it’s because I’m a business major

It’s not a rerun

New blog

Too mucheth timeth on your hand me doth pretest

What is all the fuss about

What’s hash’s tall friends name again

Story time

Blog 3

Padre 05

tcejbus on reve golb tsegnol

Sunday, November 4, 2007

fieldtrip

Well its that time again. Jacob's best attribute is his ability to get out of work. I've been told many a time, "If you worked as hard as did at your jobs as you do trying to get out of work, you would already been in a C-level job." Be that as it may, Its time for another visit from your favorite bloggist. This time I will have the dates January 30 or 31 through Feb 3. Ive christened a lot of couches in that time and Im willing to (re)christen yours. So let me know if you would like to have some fun together. There are already some front runners who have emailed me personally, but it is still open to all of you. So let me know.

I made spam and potatoes with sauteed onions, fantabulous it was!

Jacob

Sunday, October 28, 2007

columbus day

columbus day

I had another 3 day weekend and utep had another home game so I went home. Got home around 10 and went over to Hemingway's. juse, Richard, bob, luis, guns, Carla, drew, hash, alexa, luis' sisters, and bobby all showed up. It was nice to see all of them. I had never talked with bobby before, but we were able to have pretentious ive been abroad conversations. Hemingways has upgraded their beer selection nicely, I had a very good double chocolate bock, which got passed around like your loose sister. Saturday morning watched a little bit of espn game day then went to smokeys with my mom. Saturday afternoon went tailgating. The saddest thing in the world happened when the library lawn was conveniently closed for seeding and aeration.






So we were forced to tailgate besides the brumbelow building. It blowed hard
I made the trek over cardiac hill to see my family and eat their food. I got to see franky c. hadn't seen him in ages. Came back didnt see any fraternity, but saw a bunch of my old golf course buddies. Some of them are there now, others aren't, either way I was welcomed with open arms. We were playing Tulsa that night and like the previous games against smu and nmsu it went down to the wire. But we won. Paul brought along his annoying girlfriend. Who apparently graduated from hanks in 2001, but I had never seen her before in my life. I guess she wasn't into fine arts or AP. Afterwards everyone went to hemingways to hang out, I went out with someones girlfriend. I didn't know she was someones girlfriend. But her boyfriend called during our meal and I didn't know she was your girlfriend, but if you have a girlfriend and don't tell anyone and you are someones girlfriend but don't tell anyone, how would I know, and if I didn't know then im going to flirt. So now I know, but not before everyone made fun of me. Oh well. Sunday kinda sucked we had to go move furniture, because my mom's cousins parents died and so they were cleaning out their house. We had about 3 hours of chitting and chatting and only 30 minutes of work. I was getting kinda agitated because I had homework to do, so I got things going, and we ended up taking more stuff they we had planned too, and we ended up just putting it in the garage which made zekey extremely happy. Afterwards we had a party at the house. Chicken, ribs, and brisket mmmm bitch. I met two more cousins from Lubbock, theyre in high school, but new cousins are new cousins and I'll take that. Sunday night, drew, hash, alexa and I went to see death at a funeral. Extremely funny british comedy, Netflix it, youll like it. Monday was a non-holiday for everyone who doesn't work in the government, so I just chilled at home did homework, watched some girls kiss online, checked for cancer. Got on the road about 3 and was home by 8, I drove kind of slow. Another short story but that's all I have to say. See you next week.


jacob

Sunday, October 21, 2007

3rd house guest

3rd house guest

the week after budapest my third house guest came to visit. his name is oscar venegas. none of you know him and he doesnt even read this thing, but hes my third house guest in two years so ill write about it. he and i were in the same major at utep and we worked together as interns at varay in el paso. he came in town for a dod career fair they were having here in town. he was poised to arrive at 7am which i didnt mind because thats later than i normally get up but he didnt end up getting here until about 11. no big deal, we went to a restaurant here called buffalo wild wings, you may know it as bw3, if you know it at all. i had the absolute coldest beer ive ever had, there were frozen beer chips, thats how cold it was. after that we went to play golf on the the bases' golf course. a pretty nice course that backs up to the mountain, dry , but nice. its not paved and just about every hole has warning signs for rattlesnakes, but i didnt see any. i ended up shooting 104, which is bad for me, but i only play golf once or twice a year, so no big deal. i hadnt seen skeelo, as he is affectionately known, in almost two years, but like most of my friends we just pick up where we left off, we were making fun of our old bosses and coworkers, making fun of el paso and all of the crappy legislators that run the place. and for whatever reason every other word out of our mouths was a curse word. maybe because skeelo is in the army, i dont know why, but when were together, its just a one big r-rated event. after golf we went to a restaurant called el paso. its a bbq chain from phoenix, pretty good stuff, they serve beer in these huge goblets, i had the dr. pepper steak, it wasnt bad, wasnt good either. after that we just called it a night. the next day was his career fair, and like most career fairs they tell you to post your resume online. unless you are planning to move to sierra vista, they didnt really want to see you, and if you didnt have a top secret clearance then you were also out of luck. so he turned in a bunch of resumes but i dont think he heard anything back. after that we went to applebees and i had the all you could eat soup and salad. pretty good stuff, but it takes so long for them to bring your seconds that you lose your appetite. i could probably put away 4 of their soups and 4 of their salads, but i was "done" after two. they also faild to bring me a spoon both times. skeelo took off after that and i went home and did homework. he has a radar detector and got home in about 3.5 hours, not too bad for 311 mile journey. that was my tale for my third guest, i would love for you to be my fourth guest. youd get your own blog, think about it...

v/r

jacob

p.s. skeelo is now working on ft. bliss maintaining sms servers. im not going to bother explaining that to you.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

tsas of the world

well weve finally come to the end of the budapest blogs and before you know it the croatia blogs will be before us. since it is my duty to fight with tsa i thought i would let you all know about the tsas ive encountered overseas. going to budapest was no big deal, regular american stuff, xray, shoes off, and the like. same goes for zurich, except for the shoes. an interesting fact about the shoe bomber was told to me by my friend amanda. it turns out that there would have been no way for him to ignite the c4 he had on his shoes because it takes an extreme amount of energy to do so. an energy source that no one would be able to sneak aboard. but thanks to him ill forever have to stand on dirty tile or dirty carpet barefoot before getting on my plane. on the way back we had to go through hungarian customs since we had an international departure. the tsa of hungary was not a very high tech operatiom. but they did have a woman who if you squinted you could imagine her with rollers, an ashy cigarette, slippers, and an appron. she had on a uniform, but this is how i pictured her afterhours. she was handing out laundry baskets for us to put our things in. they werent really worried about laptops or the 3oz liquid ban. it took all of 200 seconds to get through their security. now when we fly in america once your in the terminal you are considered secure, this holds true for the airports where you make your connecting flight. not so in germany. you have to leave the terminal and re-enter security. this is a more high-tech job, but its only a 2 man job. one person looks at the x-ray, the other wands you down. no metal detectors here. when it was my turn, i removed my laptop, took off my shoes, emptied my pockets, took out my bag of permissable liquids and proceeded to receive a healthy pat-down. i was wanded and when the wand beeped on my belt buckle, i was placed up against the wall and got a good massage via laytex gloves. he did everything except go in my underwear. i didnt react, but i was thinking, "hello, how are you, how are things down inside my pants" i was able to control the blushing in my face, the entire security line was watching the show. so after play-time i was collecting my things and the officer said he wanted to look through my bag. "sure go for it", whats this, mp3 player, whats this, camera, whats this, charger for said mp3 player, whats this, eyeglass case, whats this, neck pillow, whys it hard, it has a built in massager, im going to have to run these through again. okay! so where are you coming from, where are you going, i gave appropriate answers, even i know when not to jack with people. okay well can we re-run your laptop, sure! okay well can we sit you down for some questions or will you miss your flight? (thank god my flight was in 25 minutes) i said no and showed him my itenerary and he ughhed, shrugged, and let me be. well i thought the worse was over, but then i got to the AA ticket counter. i still had hungarian tickets and i had to have them changed over. but not before i went throught the manifest gestapo and his checks and balances. name please, passport, why are you late, where are you coming from, where are you going, where did you pack your bags, what time did you pack your bags, has anyone asked you to carry anything on for them, have you been in possesion of your bags at all times. i passed that test, and finally it was on to the ticketing agent. hi, thanks for flying american, have a wonderful flight, i grumble grumble grumbled. 11 hours later back in the US and A. got off the plane in DFW and everyone was running to passport check. i thought that was strange and continued to stroll lazily with my 3 foot gait. turns out, every international flight into dallas on american comes in at or around 3pm. there were about 50 booths with 2 checkers per booth to handle this mess. the lines are split, US and A and all others, but the snake line has about 11 turns in it and i was at the end which wasnt even in the roped section yet. got to the passport checker and he asked all his question, who what where why, why when why again, quietly said DoD contractor and all questioning ceased. then he said welcome home. and i dont know why that has stuck with me even a month later now. im sure he says that 1000 times a day, didnt really care about me, didnt say it in a caring manner, but i just really felt welcomed for some strange reason. after that we went down to the basement to gather our luggage and turn in our immigration forms. that was a cluster-fuck, no lines and no questioning, just pushing and fighting with everyone else trying to re-check their baggage. so back up to the terminal area, and some how or another found myself in another security line. all of my teammates are in the platinum club, so they were able to go to the shorter security line. i am still stearage and had to wait in the schmuck line. standard operating procedure, except i had to go through one of those new air machines. its a new machine by GE that shoots air on you from all different directions and I guess depending on the air analysis or if the air bounces off you in a funny direction you are sequestered. i passed and was able to go about my business. having had the oportunity to try out other tsas im not sure whos the best and whose the worst. budapest is clearly the easiest, but it didnt feel real secure. frankfurt was naughty naughty, and the US and A were jerks like always. so i guess that means the matter is inconclusive to date. i guess the american one is my favorite because i know what to expect and if need be i can explain my way out of something. im not sure what to expect on future trips, all i know is that i cant speak the language anywhere.

2007 is the greatest collegiate football season of all time,

egg

Monday, October 8, 2007

Anton Weismann

Anton Weismann talked for just about 10 hours straight. He is the guy i sat next to on my flight to zurich. He talked because he likes to hear his voice, so I can tell. I didn't really say much over the course of the flight, just mostly nodded and smiled kind of like we do with girls, don't care what they are saying just them keep talking and they'll like you all the while. So first Anton broke into how American sucks. This is the third time this year an American flight has been delayed and he doesn't know why he continues to fly them. He says the airline needs to be nationalized like every other country. His favorite is the German Lufthansa; they really know how to treat you even if you are in the last row of steerage. He bashed bush for awhile, complaining about us being in Iraq and all that kind of stuff. But then he praised him for having balls and never backing down from his decisions and being ballsy, he was really focused on balls. Then he talked about Kiev and all the things he was going to do there, he was going to be there for two weeks visiting his family and possibly looking for a place to live. He's part Ukrainian, on his mother's side, he hails from north Dakota, went to UND where he was a starting forward on the fighting Sioux hockey team. He was never that good enough for the NHL so he focused on his studies. He was finance major and he has his MBA in finance. He worked for some French energy company can't remember the name. Now he works for Halliburton, so I wasn't too sure why he bashed bush so much. Halliburton is doing wonderful thanks to bush and Cheney. He speaks 11 languages so he says; I say he speaks a little bit of maybe 7. If you can speak a little Italian you can speak a little Spanish, if you can speak a little Russian you can speak in Eastern Europe that is my opinion. He talked about he started school in 1949 yadda yadda yadda, join the marines when he was 17, lost his virginity to a 31 yr old Jamaican whore in Jamaica. Yadda yadda yadda, lived on a boat the rest of his enlistment. Going to retire in Ukraine. During the 1st movie, Shrek III an message came on stating there was a medical situation and if anyone was a trained medical profession, he calmly stated that that Mexican woman over there is. Then a little bit later on the pilot came over asking if anyone spoke Turkish or Arabic. He stated ohh that guy over there can. So I don't know if he just pre-interviewed everyone before the trip or just talked to everyone on the plane. (He got up several times, it wasn't just a straight 600 minute conversation) he spoke with all the flight attendants and got lots of juicy details. Why we had to go back to the gate after initially pulling away. He told me which of the flight attendants were cool and which ones were bitches. The guy was the only cool one. He actually broke conversation to watch a 60 minutes documentary on the release of holocaust documents from the German archives. He didn't watch any of Shrek III but he watched a lot of the second movie, I don't know what it was, but it was about a girl's basketball coach in Oklahoma and how he took them to state title, I'm not sure what it was called but I saw it the first few times, hoosiers, glory road, coach carter, air bud. He thought it was cute. Then we got breakfast but it wasn't up to his liking, on Lufthansa you get an omelet and fresh fruit and coffee, yadda yadda yadda. On American we got a thing of yogurt, orange juice, and croissant with jam and jelly. It's a pretty kick ass continental breakfast if you ask me. He wasn't happy. As I scroll my eyes up I see I didn't talk about dinner, we had the choice of lasagna with a roll, Caesar salad, and lemon cookies or chicken, mashed potatoes, and green beans. I had the former he had the latter, he complained of course because he had to pay for the red wine with dinner, he said it should be complimentary, he also didn't like that he didn't get a cognac after dinner. He would later go on a tangent comparing wine at dinner and after dinner coffee and cognac on par with sex. I have no such working knowledge of any of those things, so that was lost on me. And I guess that's about it for my seat partner, I don't know why I remember so much, this being my 4th day since I saw him, and I haven't gone gay for anton, I guess with nothing else to do for ten hours I just paid attention. So ill never see him again nor can I picture his face anymore, funny how something like that happens; the face thing.

The schick quarto is crap, stay with Gillette mach 3 turbo,

jacob

Sunday, September 30, 2007

budapest in pictures

budapest in pictures

here is the rest of budapest so you can see what i was talking about.

the budapest airport

some church

with some statue outside of it

it wouldnt be a trip if i didnt go to a wedding

a gymnasium

early morning from my hotel room

my hotel room with the tiny entrance

shot from another room in the hotel

same as before

i couldnt find any good swimming pools

a nice looking hotel

some guy who died in battle

these are the steps of parliament

the other side of what those stairs lead to

inside of the parliament dome

the crown jewels of hungary

the creepy statues from the house on haunted hill

the parliamentary room

cigar holders

the hungarian flag used to have a red star in the middle when it was under communism rule, they cut out the star as a symbol of their democracy

an eternal flame memorial for people who died protesting for democracy

the unblue danube

a hungarian florist, please notice the topless bride

the palace

i dont remember this kings name, but he liked hunting and women

another picture at the palace

the danube from the palace

parliament from the palace

this is st. stephens mausoleum, i dont know if hes in there though, i wasnt really paying attention to the tour guide

how they served wine at dinner, its a giant crystal wine bong

i got a little home sick so i went to this bar

heres me in the shower, there isnt much of a optical illusion here, the shower head hit me right above the naval, so showering was a little difficult

i thought it would be easier to take a bath, but after i saw this, i thought it would be easier to have the ugly water cascade off me rather than sit in it

on the last night we had dinner on a river boat, here is the main bridge between buda and pest

the palace lit up at night

parliament at night

parliament at night

and parliament at night

ill be home on friday

jacob