Chrimmus in Grenada
So as many as you know you didn’t see me this year for Christmas. That’s because I was in the Caribbean. So even though it didn’t feel like Christmas, you quickly forget it all because you are on a tropical fucking island.
Saturday
My flight was ass early in the morning, 0550 in the morning. I was in first so I just slept. Got to DFW just before 8. Had an egg mcmuffin. Found some family members, unfortunately, that’s where I left them. They were flying from Kansas and were late leaving; they had to spend the rest of the day in Texas. Not that bad if you ask me. Andrew and I got to Miami and met some other family members. We were the only ones in first and they all scoffed at us. Few hours later we landed on the island. We stopped just before the end of the run way and then busted a donut and turned around back to the terminal. They only have one runway and only one entrance and exit. After we got through immigration and customs and got our baggage we went outside to wait for our ride. There were a bunch of guys waiting outside drinking. I could hear them talking, “That guy looks like Ryan”, “I think that’s Ryan”, “No that’s not Ryan”, “Well he holds his luggage like Ryan”, “He stands like Ryan”, “I think its Quinn”, “Hey man, can we take your picture, it’s because you look like our friend” “Sure, are you talking about Ryan Quinn”. “Nooooooooooooooo, you know Ryan, you don’t know Ryan, how do you know Ryan, shut up” Just then Ryan walked out and I pointed to him, that guy I said, Oh my God, you do know him” Then I got hugs and drinks. Later on that night we were back at the house just chilling and talking to cousins. Some of them decided to go out, but I decided to stay in. It was already 1 in the morning. Yes maybe I’m lame but whatever. Just as an FYI, they don’t close the clubs in Grenada. If you got money to spend they will let you.
Sunday
This was just a chill day. I went for kayak ride in the bay. Had some sandwiches then we went to the beach. That was a pretty fun beach called Spray Bay. My brother and I fought and that was fun. Later that night we just drank some beer and chilled at home. I can’t remember what we did that night.
Monday
We went shopping, got some chocolate, some rum, and some pizza. Then we went to the tourist beach and saw a bunch of crappy Britains. You can tell they are Britains because they look like lobsters and they suck. Then we went back to Spray Bay. Then we just chilled at home.
Tuesday
We had our only planned day of activities. First we just took a tour of the island. Then we went to a cocoa plantation. That was pretty interesting; cocoa is fermented before they use it for chocolate. Fermenting cocoa smells worse than the rodeo. We were also given an introduction to all the fruits that grow on the island. Did you know that loofahs are plants that fall into the river and then they are harvested in the ocean. Bet you didn’t. Next we went to a rum distillery. It was pretty interesting. It’s called Rivers Rum. It’s been around since 1785, they haven’t changed a thing since then. It’s pretty ghetto, but still interesting. The river is sold at 140 proof. It’s about 5 bucks a bottle; it’s what the winos drink in Grenada. After that we just went to another beach, one that was a bit more treacherous. Saw a uber tanned European. She didn’t give me a second look. She took her top off later according to my cousins. They said they are fans of bronze titties. That night all of the cousins went out to a bar. It was a pretty chill bar. We got tired so we took most of the bar patrons back to our house. We went through a few cases of beer playing 7-11 doubles. I’ll have to teach you Luis, since you love drinking games. It’s probably the best one I’ve ever played. I went to bed at 3, but Andrew stayed up and partied.
Wednesday
Fast forward 1.5 hours and they are waking Andrew up for some deep sea fishing. Poor bastard. They were on the boat at 0830. 0835 Andrews puking is sexy guts out. Then throughout the morning he was puking and dry heaving. Luckily for them they caught a 100 pound yellow fin tuna. This thing was the size of a small human. It was 5 feet long and 100 pounds. Son of a bitch tasted wonderful after it was seared. The rest of us went hiking to the Seven Sisters waterfalls. Pretty easy hike although it was really muddy. Nice fresh water waterfalls and pools, it was very cold. Then we had the bright idea to jump off the waterfall. The hike was very steep and deep mud. Once we got to the top of the waterfall the height looked much higher. 1-2-3 I jumped 1-2-3 seconds later I was in the water. Maybe not that long, but it sure felt like I was in the air for a long time. After I got out of the water I was shaking and everyone wanted to know why. I just high fived everyone, I didn’t know what, just exhilarating and my heart was pumping something fierce. So we hiked backed up, got a little rained on then we just went home and chilled.
If you cant tell I did a lot of chilling on this vacation. No work, no school work, no timetables, slept every day until my body decided to wake up. It was very nice.
Thursday
Merry Christmas. Another day of chilling. We went for a pretty long kayak ride. Then got some sun. A little too much sun. The whole week I was slathering on spf 1000, and I didn’t do a good enough job of putting it on. I was sunburned the next day. We had a late lunch, then we went to watch 24 hours of a Christmas story. Youd be surprised how many people have never seen that. Its awesome, especially watching a few minutes here then watching another few minutes in an hour later. We then played some family trivia games, my team lost. Later that night we had some awesome Christmas day dinner leftovers then watched Step Brothers. That was really funny, a pretty bad movie, but lots of great one liners.
Friday
We got up fairly early for a catamaran ride. That was a good trip. We went to an area where an artist set up some under water sculptures. Unfortunately it was pretty windy and choppy so all the ocean floor sentiment was kicked up and you couldn’t see anything. Then we went for a ride around the island. Had lunch on a small island. On the way home the winds were pretty high so we put the sails up and started hauling. Well not really, were going about 9 knots but it felt like 60 mph. we were jumping some waves. Plus it was kind of a booze cruise, so that’s always fun. Grenada had the best beer Ive ever had. Ive been to Germany and you can throw out all of their German purification laws, if I could only have one beer the rest of my life it would be Carib lager from Grenada. If you ever see some, get some, but don’t get Trinidad Carib. It is very inferior. The rest of the ride home was fun. That night we just did more hanging out. My crappy sister watched Mama Mia. So the other cousins just played cards and made fun of them. We had to get up early the next day so I didn’t want to go out that night, but Brandon did and he went to town. He got back around 0230, did a face plant into his bed and ended up pissing himself.
Saturday
This was our flight home day. When we checked in I saw this woman who was in a wheelchair and was on oxygen. Well when I got on the plane she was there in first class and was looking around and talking. She was actually flying with a air ambulance service. About an hour into the flight they checked on her and couldn’t find a pulse. So they started doing resuscitation, the ambulance guy was pretty worthless. The flight attendants were doing a better job. They eventually called for doctors and there happened to be two on board. They came up and started doing their best, about 4 minutes later the woman doctor looks up to the husband and says im sorry, we lost her. Well the husband started crying and the doctor did a little bit too. They put her in the chair and put a blanket over her. We had another hour to Miami but the pilot didn’t want to do that so we diverted to Puerto Rico. When we landed, the paramedics came on and did nothing. They just left her there and the passengers de-boarded the plane. I thought it was rather insensitive. American Airlines had quite a task getting me home that day. They spent 20 minutes and still couldn’t find a route home. Well they got Andrew home that day so I went back and spoke to another agent. I asked her how she got me home but the other guy couldn’t, “Pos, I don’t know Corazon” Well that made it all worth it, I love sassy Puerto Ricans. So I got home and just chilled. Ahh chilling, it was rather chilly in Tucson, my car was iced over when I got there.
So there you have it, I may have forgotten something, but I always do when I write these thing post trip.
Happy New Year,
Jacob
